A husband stepped on one of those penny scales that tell you your fortune and weight and dropped in a coin.”Listen to this,” he said to his wife, showing her a small, white card. “It says I’m energetic, bright, resourceful and a great lover.””Yeah,” his wife nodded, “and it has
A guy who was in the Air Force had just spent a year tour unaccompanied to Alaska.The first night he got home, he exclaimed to his wife, “Honey, I want you to know that I haven’t wasted all this time alone. Instead, I’ve mastered the art of mind over matter.
My HMO is terrible. They charge me for a self-examination.It’s a flat fee.-Wendy Liebman
An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. “I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?” “It’s $50,000,” the lawyer said. “But why? You’ll be dead soon, why do you want to become
Why did the blonde have lipstick on her stearing wheel?She was trying to blow the horn!
A woman orders a chicken sandwhich and starts to choke.People are running frantically, trying to figure outwhat to do. Two homosexuals sitting in the corner wisperto each other and run in front of the choking lady. Onestrips out of his overalls, bends over butt naked in frontof his friend. His
I had my appendix removed. There was nothing wrong with it, I just did it as a warning to the other organs in my body to shape up or they’re out of there-Charlie Viracola