I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.Can I borrow that quarter, ’cause my mom told me to call home when
1. Man: “So, wanna go back to my place?” Woman: “Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”2. The most memorable rebuttal to a turn down (used by the guy who used to live across the hall from me in residence) when he asked a girl to
Two retired ladies were on the beach in Miami.They were discussing the fact that if they gofor a swim, someone might steal their cigarettes,but if they take the cigarettes with them, theywill get soaked. Then they notice a gorgeous girlwalking out of the ocean. She reaches into the topof her
66.A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices that she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies, “This is a very interesting book about sexual
College by Dave Barry Many of you young persons out there are seriously thinking about going to college. (That is, of course, a lie. The only things you young persons think seriously about are loud music and sex. Trust me: these are closely related to college.) College is basically a
Continuing with our list of dumb excuses that will guarantee you won’t be invited out again! (unless of course your married an the wife makes you go!)I’D LOVE TO BUT…… I changed the lock on my door and now I can’t get out. … I feel a song coming on.
A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn; the wife preferred to read. One morning the husband returned after several hours of fishing and decided to take a short nap. The wife decided to take the boat