Having a dog is great, it’s just the ‘dog people’ that freak me out. “Oh, look at her, she’s precious,just like Mommy.” Me?!? If I birthed something that had 8 nipples – it ain’t leaving the house.
How long does it take to burn a candle down ? About a wick !
Gravely ill, the Skipper was examined by a doctor while his wife stood by.After the examination the physician motioned for her to meet him in the hallway. “Your husband is very sick,” the doctor said. “Still, you can do three things to ensure his survival.First, fix him three healthy meals
A man and a woman meet at bar one day and are getting along really well. They decide to go back to the woman’s house where they engage in passionate love making.The woman suddenly cocks her ear and says, “Quick my husband just got home, go hide in the bathroom!”
How do you tell if you are in a gay church? Only half the congregation is kneeling.
I knew this guy. He was a sound guy from Ireland.He spoke to me one day and told me he was going to apply for a job.He told me that he walked out because the guyasked me for my name and i said”Paddy Milligan”. He said “How do you spell”Milligan”?
A persistent job-seeker once appeared before President Lincoln and demanded an appointment to a judgeship. He was informed that there were no vacancies. The next day, while walking along the river, he saw a drowned man being pulled out, and recognized him as a federal judge. He ran back to