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Tag: attorney

Total 29 Posts

Bribery 2

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. “Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?” The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn’t hear the question. “Isn’t it true that you accepted five thousand

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A farmer walked into an attorney office…

A farmer walked into an attorney’s office wanting to file for adivorce. The attorney asked, “May I help you?” The farmer said,”Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorce’s.”The attorney said, “well do you have any grounds?” The farmersaid, “Yea, I got about 140 acres.” The attorney said, ”

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Do you know me?

|A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial–a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?” She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a young boy. And frankly,

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Lawyers take everything

|A reporter outside of a courtroom asked a defendant clad only in a barrel: “Oh, I see your attorney lost the case!” The defendant answered, “No, we won.”

Rules for hunting lawyers

|1. Any person with a valid Washington State hunting license may harvest attorneys.2. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited. 3. Killing of attorneys with a vehicle is prohibited. If accidentally struck, remove dead attorney to roadside and proceed to

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That’s a real bargain

|A Dublin lawyer died in poverty, and many people donated to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. “Only a shilling?” said the Justice, “Only a shilling to bury an attorney? Here’s a guinea; go and bury twenty more of

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Bad Thoughts

A couple were celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary at their home.Everyone was having a great time except for the wife who sat off in a corner with a tear in her eye. The family attorney came over to her and asked what was wrong. The wife told him, “Remember when

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