A judge in a small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendant, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under the influence, demanded a jury trial. It was nearly 4:30 p.m. and getting a jury would take time, so the judge called a recess and
Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted a kitten for Christmas. Her mother couldn’t buy a kitten and parcel it up for Christmas Day, so she bought it a week before Christmas and gave it to the little girl. ‘You’re getting your Christmas present a week
A frustrated wife decided her sex life needed spicing up.After work, she went shopping and picked up a pair of crotchless panties. She went home and donned the new garment, and selected a short skirt to go with it.She greeted her husband when he came home from work and sat
1. American Express calls and says: “Leave home without it!”2. Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.3. You’re formulating a plan to rob the food bank.4. You’ve rolled so many pennies, you’ve formed a psychic bond with Abe Lincoln.5. Long distance companies don’t
A visiting conventioneer from Saskatchewan walked into a bar in Greenwich Village and sat next to a rather attractive woman.”Hi,” he said, “I’m new in town. Can I buy you a drink?””Get lost,” she remarked, “I am Lesbian.””Oh, really?” he asked, “How are things in Beiruit?”
A guy walks into a bar and sits down next to a man who has a burlap sack and a little guy about a foot tall sitting on the bar playing a little piano. The guy that walked into the bar asks the man, “What’s in the bag?” The man
At a convention of biological scientists one researcher remarks to another: “Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?” “Really?” the other replied, “Why did you switch?” “Well, for four very good reasons. First we found that lawyers are far more
