|Two blondes had driven across the country to see Disney World in Florida.As they approached it and got onto the final stretch of highway, they saw a sign saying “Disney World Left!”After thinking for a minute, the driver blonde said “Oh well!” and started driving back home.
A busload of politicians were driving down a country road when, all of a sudden, the bus ran off the road, and crashed into a tree in an old farmer’s field.The old farmer, after seeing what had happened, went over to investigate. He then proceeded to dig a hole to
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, “I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine’s day. What do you think it means?” “You’ll know tonight.” he said. That evening, the man came home with a package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she
Biddle and Payne, two elderly English professors, were having lunch in the cafeteria. During the course of the conversation, Biddle said, “A student gave me a peculiar answer in class today. I asked who wrote the Merchant of Venice and a sophomore said, “Please, sir, it wasn’t me!” “Ha, ha!”
An elderly man goes into confession and says to the priest, “Father, I’m 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren. I started taking this new Viagra pill, and last night I had an affair and made love to two 18-year-old girls. Both of them. Twice.The priest said:
What do elves learn in school?The ELF-abet.How many reindeer does Santa have?11 (named below):Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen,Rudolph (the one with the red nose),Olive (all of the other reigndeer)and Al (Then Al the reigndeer loved him all).What nationality is Santa Claus?North PolishWhat kind of bird can write?A
President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar.A guy walks in and asks the barman, “Isn’t that Bush and Powell sitting over there?”The barman says, “Yep, that’s them.”So the guy walks over and says, “Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?”Bush says,