Why are sheep always in a field? Because they can’t get out !Who gives my cat his Christmas presents? Santa Paws!Who gives my other cat his Christmas presents? Santa Claws!What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around while i go ahead!Whats the difference between a snowman and
Q: What’s the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer?A: The taste!
|Flight fifty has a pretty rough time above the ocean. Suddenly a voice comes over the intercom: “Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seat belts and assume crash positions. We have lost our engines and we are trying to put this baby as gentle as possible down on the water”.”Oh
Yo mama’s so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn’t get a menu, she gets an estimate.
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? No one knows, it’s never happened.
|It was a few days before Christmas. The trip went reasonably well, and he was ready to go back home. The airport on the other end had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols. Being someone who took Christmas very seriously,
Yo mama’s so fat, I ran around her twice and got lost