|1. Not spending enough quality time with the kitchen applicances.2. Came dressed in only a towel…again.3. Ran out of paper clips.4. I’ve decided to telecommute.5. Ambassador to Belgium is at the White House.6. It’s a long drive home to Texas.7. One-day sale at Macy’s.8. My brain is melting!9. I think
A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk. “What are they doing, Grandma?” asked the little girl. The grandmother was embarrased, so she said, “The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying
Where do you have to go to find a man who is truly into commitment? A mental hospital.
Your Honor, it was an accident! I had to run into the fence to keep from hitting the cow! Was it a Jersey cow? I don’t know, I didn’t see her license plate!
Why did the baseball coach throw Cinderella off the team?Because she ran away from the ball.
The teacher of the fourth grade class was giving an English lesson:”All right class, I want everyone to write a sentence which starts with a question and ends with an answer and has the words possible and definite in it!”All at once, young Johnny’s hand shot up.”Miss! Miss!” called Johnny.”Write
|1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion