The company president called the chief security guard into his office. “Chuck, we’ve received a complaint from one of the employees that you are making obscene sexual comments and putting your hands where they don’tbelong. These unwanted advances will have to stop.” Chuck looked down at his feet and mumbled,
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A: Because the chicken wasn’t invented yet.
So this grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender looks up and says “Hey! Your a grasshopper! We have a drink named after you!”.The grasshopper says “Oh yeah? You have a drink named Leonard?!”.
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandfather in the hospital.”How are you grandpa?” he asks.”Feeling fine,” says the old man.”What’s the food like?””Terrific, wonderful menus.””And the nursing?””Just couldn’t be better. These young nurses really take care of you.””What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?””No problem at all — nine
|A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar.A $40 speeding ticket was included.Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40.The police responded with another mailed photo — of handcuffs.
How do you know if your secretary?s having a bad day?Her tampon is behind her ear and she can’t find her pencil
An engineering student is walking on campus one day, when another engineer student rides up on a shiny new motorcycle.”Where did you get such a functional bike?” asked the first.The second engineer replied: “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on