A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed. “Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain. “Yes,” replied the murderer. “Will you hold my hand?”
A woman in her 90’s is distraught after the death of her warm, caring, faithful husband of seventy years. She can’t live without him and decides that the best way to do herself in is to stab herself in her pitifully broken heart. Still, she doesn’t want to linger so
|What did the footballer say when he accidentally burped during a game?Sorry, it was a freak hic! Why are football grounds odd?Because you can sit in the stands but can’t stand in the sits! What do you get if you drop a piano on a team’s defence?A flat back four!
A tiny but dignified old lady was among a group looking at an art exhibition in a newly opened gallery. Suddenly one contemporary painting caught her eye. “What on earth,” she inquired of the artist standing nearby, “is that?” He smiled condescendingly. “That, my dear lady, is supposed to be
Doctor, Doctor When I press with my finger here… it hurts, and here… it hurts, and here… and here… What do you think is wrong with me? You have a broken finger!
Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates. The warden saw that deep down, Andy was a good person and made arrangements for Andy to learn a trade while doing his time. After three years,
A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car followed by a large cloud of feathers.Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse, and rang the door bell. A farmer appeared.The man, somewhat nervously said,