A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.”You’ll get your chance in court,” said the Desk Sergeant.”No, no, no!” said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife.
Tag: wife
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Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end. Finally she couldn’t take it any longer, and told him, “Listen, it means nothing, they even have a vice president of peas
A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, “Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. “I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent
There was this old guy wandering around in a supermarket calling out at intervals -“Crisco? Crisco? CRIS–CO!!!!”Finally a store clerk approached.”Sir, the Crisco is on aisle five.””Oh,” replied the old guy, “I’m not looking for Crisco, I’m calling my wife.””Your wife is named “Crisco?””Nah,” he answered, “I only call her
An elderly man thinking his wife was losing her hearing went about20′ behind her and asked “Can you hear me sweetheart”?. No reply. Moved to 10′ and inquired again. No reply. 5′ and not a word. A few inches behind ear, he asked “Can you hear me now honey”? His
This old man in his eighties got up and was putting on his coat.His wife said, “Where are you going ?”He said, “I’m going to the doctor.”And she said, “Why? Are you sick?””No,” he said. “I’m going to get me some of those new Viagra pills.”So his wife got up
*** COPIED FROM A NEWSGROUP POSTING ***(the male author was responding to a woman who accidentally walked into the men’s restroom):Please don’t feel bad. It wasn’t you entering the men’s washroom that caused that guy to pee on the guy next to him. Hell, we do that all the time.