Paddy Murphy had just returned to Ireland from a holiday in Australia.His mate asked him what it was like.”Australia’s a great place!” Paddy replied. “First they take you homeand fill you so full of piss you can’t stand up. Then, to top it off, theylet you fuck their women whenever
The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That’s an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that’s the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates. Why did the English people build them like
|How do snails get their shells so shiny?They use snail varnish!
An Irishman, Englishman and Scotchman sitting on a beach notice a mermaid sitting on a rock. The Englishman approaches her and says ‘Have you ever been kissed?’ No says the Mermaid. He kisses her and she likes it. after a while the Scotchman approaches her and says ‘Have you ever
1. A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT APPROACHES ARE BEING TRIED- We are still pissing in the wind.2. EXTENSIVE REPORT IS BEING PREPARED ON A FRESH APPROACH TO THE PROBLEM- We just hired three kids fresh out of college.3. CLOSE PROJECT COORDINATION- We know who to blame.4. MAJOR TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH- It works
|What is the difference between school dinners and a pile of slugs?School dinners come on a plate!
An Australian joke…St Peter is standing at the pearly gates one day when a pair of Abo’s stroll up.”Your names aren’t on today’s list… let me go and ask the Boss” he says.In God’s office he tells the Big Man all about the two Abo’s, and Godtells Peter to go