A Jewish couple, are sitting together on an airplane flying tothe Far East. Over the public address system, the Captain announces: “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some verybad news. Our engines have ceased functioning, and this planewill be going down momentarily. Luckily, I see an island belowus
Q: How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb? A: One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
First witch: Here’s a banana if you can spell it. Second witch: I can spell banana. I just don’t know when to stop.
After WWII, two Poles returned to their destroyed village to locate the first one’s wife. Going through the rubble, Victor came across a dismembered arm and called over, “Hey, Stanley, wasn’t this Anya’s arm? I think this is the wristwatch you gave her.””I dunno, Victor,” said Stanley, and they continued
|Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin?A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.Q: Why are orchestra intermissions limited to 20 minutes?A: So you don’t have to retrain the cellists.Q: How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?A: Write ‘pp, espressivo’.
How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?They had reservations.
Q: How many Communists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two – one to screw it in, and a second to hand out leaflets. A: One, but it takes him about 30 years to realize that the old one has burnt out.