Psychiatric HotlineIf you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace
Holton sat down in a Green Bay restaurant and said to the waitress, “Do you know whether the milk from this dairy is pasteurized?” “Sure is!” she answered. “Every morning they turn the cows out to pasture.”
Q: Did you hear about the new blonde hoodlum? A: She runs around spray-painting her name on chain link fences.
A neatly dressed salesman stopped a man in the street and asked -“Sir, would you like to buy a a bottle of this mouthwash for $200.00?”Aghast, the man said, “are you NUTS?, that’s robbery!”The salesman seemed hurt and then tries again -“Sir, since you are a bit irate, I’ll sell
Proctologists Of all the professions we fear, one stands out. No, it’s not “mortician;” by then it’s too late. This is a word that makes a certain part of our anatomy pucker in anticipation. Yes, the word is “proctologist;” the dreaded p-word! The mere mention of the word strikes terror
Hoot: How the hell can ya be so stupid? Jessie: Well, it ain’t somethin’ yew can pick up overnight.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde that got pregnant for the second time? A: She asked her husband if they needed to get married again.