Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: The sun is shining, the day is young, we’ve got our whole lives ahead of us, and you’re inside worrying about a stupid burned out light bulb?
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. ‘ Sis,’ he said, ‘I wish you’d sing Christmas carols.’ ‘That’s nice of you, Alfie,’ she replied. ‘Why ?’ ‘Then I’d only have to hear you once a year !’
A man’s house is on fire. No help is in sight so he takes matters into his own hands.He runs out of the house with his son and tells him to wait outside.Then he runs back in and gets is daughter and brings her ouside.Then his wife. Then the dog.
Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: A whole bunch: I can only keep them in the room long enough for them to give the bulb a quarter turn apiece.
Doctor, Doctor! my sister thinks she’s an elevator. Tell her to come in. I can’t. She doesn’t stop at this floor.
At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth” even when you don’t know anything. The boy decides to go home and try
You know why there’s a string on a tampon? So the crabs can bungee jump.