Did you hear about the farmer who lost control of his tractor in the cow pasture? No! Did he hurt the cows? No, he just grazed them!
Once Santa Claus went to Ethiopia, to give the children some words of confort.He was there, with all those bony kids all around, and then they started yelling: “WE WANT TOYS!! WE WANT TOYS!!!”But then Santa, remembering his important job of orientating children to behave well, said: “A child who
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:She is not a BABE or a CHICK – She is a BREASTED AMERICAN. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE. She is not EASY – She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE. She does not TEASE or FLIRT – She
|Prisoner: Look here, doctor! You’ve already removed my spleen, tonsils, adenoids, and one of my kidneys. I only came to see if you could get me out of this place!Doctor: I am, bit by bit.
You might be a redneck if the centerpiece on your dining room table is an original signed work by a famous taxidermist.
A young lady came home and told her Mother that her boyfriend had proposed but she had turned him down because she found out he was an atheist, and didn’t believe in Heaven or Hell. “Marry him anyway, dear.” the Mother said. “Between the two of us, we’ll show him
Cow: Why don’t you shoo those flies? Bull: I’ll let them go barefoot!