Q: Why is a washing machine better than a blonde?A: Because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it won’t follow you around for a week.
|1. Avoid alliteration. Always.2. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.3. Employ the vernacular.4. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. 5. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.6. Remember to never split an infinitive.7. Contractions aren’t necessary.8. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.9. One should never generalize.10.
An American tourist went into a restaurant in a Spanish provincial city for dinner, and asked to be served the specialty of the house. When the dish arrived, he asked what kind of meat it contained. “Senor, these are the cojones,” the waiter replied. “The what, you say?” exclaimed the
Sally was a girl with no horsebackriding experience, yet one day she discided to take her chances. As she climbed on the big Palimino, it took off at a gallop. Sally was sliding off. She tried to grab the mane but she couldn’t seem to get a grip. So in
Q: Why do blondes like the GST? (GST — Goods and Services Tax nowin effect in Canada) A: Because they can spell it.Q: What is 74 to a blonde? A: 69 plus G. S. T.
|The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan
Three blondes were driving down the highway trying to get to Disneyland. They saw a sign that read ‘DisneyLand Left.’ So they went home.