Perks of being over 40…1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 3. No one expects you to run into a burning building. 4. People call at 9 PM and ask, “Did I wake you?” 5. People no
Tag: PM
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A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month. A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise. Alligators may not be kept in bathtubs. The Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in
A guy came home to his wife and said to her: “Guess what? I’ve found a great job. A 10 AM start, 2 PM finish, no overtime, no weekends and it pays $600 a week!” “That’s great,” his wife said. “Yeah, I thought so too,” he agreed. “You start on
Believe it or not, the following announcements actually appeared in various church bulletins. Don’t let worry kill you — let the church help. Thursday night – Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. For those of you
You Know You’re Getting Older When…Everything hurts and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.You feel like the night after, and you haven’t been anywhere.Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D.You get winded playing chess.Your children begin to
1. Maternity leave would last two years….with full pay.2. There would be a cure for stretch marks.3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete.4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation’s #1 health problem.5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective.6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet
The husband finally wised up to the fact that his wife was less than faithful. He hired a private investigator to follow her and inless than a week, had all the information that he needed on the “other man”.The husband convinced himself that his would still be a loving and