A local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town’s most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. “Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny
Tag: mother
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20 Reasons Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex!1. You can GET chocolate.2. “If you love me you’ll swallow that” has real meaning with chocolate.3. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.4. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.5. You can make chocolate last as long as you
The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone rang. He listened intently, and after a moment his face brightened. When he hung up, he immediately phoned his mother to tell her the good news. “Ma,” he shouted, “the results are in. I won the election!” “Honestly?” The
Presidential Election’2000Dear Abby,I am a sailor in the US Coast Guard. My parents live in the suburb ofPhiladelphia and one of my sisters, who lives in Bensenville, is marriedto a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested forgrowing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my othertwo
What’s the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids won’t eat broccoli.What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don’t know and I don’t care.What’s the difference between the capital of Russia and a calf’s mother? One is Moscow, the other is cow’s ma.Where did the vegetables go to get drunk?
Because I’m a Guy……I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I’ll miss a whole show looking for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator….when I lock my keys in the car
Monster: I’ve got to walk 25 miles home. Ghost: Why don’t you take a train. Monster: I did once, but my mother made me give it back.