Adam: “You are what you eat.” Eve: “At least he doesn’t compare me to his mother.” Abraham: “I’m goin’ not knowin’.” Noah: “Honk if you believe in treading water.” Moses: “From a basket case to the promise land.” Elizah: “When Jezebel ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Balaam: “My second donkey
Tag: mother
Total 229 Posts
A young Jewish man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and going to get married. He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.” The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three
A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police. The officer looked at the guy’s photograph, questioned her, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him. “Yes, please” she replied. “Tell him Mother didn’t come after all.”
One day a wife complained, “This wall clock almost killed my mother today. It fell only seconds after she got up from the couch.” The husband grunted and replied, “The darn clock always was slow.”
John invited his mother over for dinner one evening. During the meal, she couldn’t help but notice how attractive his roommate Judy was. She had been suspicious of a relationship between her son and his roommate for quite some time, but this only made her more curious. She watched the
A student had spent all his money, so he called his mother from college and asked if she could send him some. “Of course, I’ll send you some money, dear,” Mom said. “By the way, you left your calculus book here when you visited last month. Would you like me
It seems there was this couple from Minneapolis, Minnesota, who decided to go to Miami Beach for a few days to thaw out during one particularly cold winter. The airlines have crazy frequent flyer rules, and the wife ended up on a flight the day after her husband. The husband