Jesus and Satan got into an argument over which of them was the better computer programmer. Finally God got tired of the bickering and told them that he would judge a contest between them. They each had four hours to write the best program they could, and then God would
Tag: judge
Total 51 Posts
Mr. Schneider stood up in court. “As God is my judge, I do not owe my ex-wife any money.” Glaring down at him, the judge replied, “He’s not. I am. You do.”
A man accused of robbing a bank was tried for the final time and was found guilty. Just before he was taken away, the man looked the judge in the eye and said, “Would it be okay if I called you a son of a bitch?”The judge’s face went red
A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat. He stopped the car and asked, “Why, Irish Mike, this wouldn’t be your new beat out here in the sticks, would
A man was caught for speeding and went before the judge. The judge said, “What will you take….30 days or $30.” The man replied, “I think I’ll take the money.”
|”Haven’t I seen your face before?” a judge demanded, looking down at the defendant.”You have, Your Honor,” the man answered hopefully. “I gave your son violin lessons last winter.””Ah, yes,” recalled the judge. “Twenty years!”
A Charlotte, North Carolina man, having purchased a case of very rare, very expensive cigars, insured them against … get this … fire.Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of fabulous cigars, and having yet to make a single premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim