A lawyer’s dog, running about unleashed, b-lines for the local butcher shop and steals a roast off the counter. The butcher goes to the lawyer’s office and asks, “if a dog, running unleashed, steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for
Tag: dog
Total 254 Posts
What’s the latest dope — besides you? I heard that they tried to take an X-ray picture of your jaw, but all they got was a moving picture. You don’t believe in being artificial. You want people to hate you for yourself. When people cut their fingers you cry over
He demonstrates that beauty times brains is a constant. He donated his brain to science but they made an early withdrawal. He fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. He knows computers… He’s not fit for contact with humans. He writes blank checks
His pointers are null / uninitialized. His puzzle is missing a few pieces. His reaction time is longer than his attention span. — Thaves His root file system isn’t mounted. His seat back is not in the full upright and locked position. His shared libraries aren’t installed. His signal-to-noise ratio
Slow out of the gate. Smarter than the average bear. Smoke doesn’t make it to the top of his chimney. So boring, his dreams have Muzak. So dim, his psychic carries a flashlight. So dumb, blondes tell jokes about him. So dumb, he faxes face up. So dumb, his dog
A man buys a brand new Grand Cherokee for $30,000+, and has $400.00+ in monthly payments. He’s pretty proud of this rig and gets ahold of his friend to do some male bonding with the new ride. They go duck hunting and of course all the lakes are frozen. These
One day Pete was complaining to his friend “my elbow hurts. I bettersee a doctor”. His friend said “Don’t do that. There’s a computer inthe drug store that can diagnose anything. It’s quicker and cheaperthan visiting a doctor. Simply put a urine sample in the machine andit will diagnose your