What’s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? – 45 lbs. What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? – 45 minutesLife stinks- I lent a guy ten grand to get plastic surgery, and now I don’t know what he looks like! What is it when a man
A German tourist walks into a McDonald’s in New York City and orders a beer. (In Germany and many parts of Europe, McDonald’s actually does serve beer.) The local guy in the line behind him immediately gives him the jab: “They don’t serve BEER here, you MORON!” The German fellow
“Squawks” are problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews to fix before the next flight. Here are some squawks submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews. (P)=PROBLEM (S)=SOLUTION (P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement (S) Almost replaced left inside main
A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached acomfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we
A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travelbag onto the plane. Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed tostuff it in the overhead bin. “Do you always carry such heavy luggage?” she sighed.”No more,” the man said. “Next time, I’m riding in the bag, and
Not only is she a little young, but you’re sure that you used to dateher mother….You find out her real name is Vinnie, and you used to play littleleague with her….She has a thicker moustache than you….When you go to pick her up, her lawyer meets you at the door
Q: Did you hear about the two poofters who went to London?A: They were REALLY pissed off when they found out Big Ben was a clock.