The newlyweds were on their honeymoon when the groom asked, “Honey, you can tell me. Am I the first man?”She looked up and said, “Why does everybody ask me that?!”
|Any time you feel dumb, don’t worry. Check out the following excerpts from a “Wall Street Journal” article by Jim Carlton. Lots of people are dumber than you.1. Compaq is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the many calls asking where the “Any”
Two men are having an awfully slow round ofgolf because the two ladies in front of themmanaged to get into every sand trap, lake, andrough on the course, and they didn’t bother towave the men on through, which is proper golfetiquette.After two hours of waiting and waiting, one mansaid, “I
The headwaiter of an elegant restaurant recoiled in disgust as a man in boots, torn jeans and a leather jacket approached him. “Hey, man,” he said, “where’s the toilet?” “Go down the hall and turn left, “replied the headwaiter. “When you see the sign marked ‘Gentlemen; pay no attention to
An American, a Jew and a Canadian were in a terrible car accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room, but all three of them died before they arrived. Just as they were about to put the toe tag on the American, he stirred and opened his eyes.
A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks, “Didn’t your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?” The businessman replies, “That’s the accountant we’re looking for.”
The morning after an all-night honeymoon extravaganza in bed, the newlywed wife snuggles up to her hubby and asks, “Sweetheart, how many others were there before me?”After a few minutes of silence, the wife says, “Well, I’m waiting.”And the guy takes a deep breath and says, “Well, I’m still counting.”