The night before her wedding, the bride-to-be talked with her mother. “Mom,” she said, “I want you to teach me how to make my new husband happy.”The mother took a deep breath and began, “When two people love, honor, and respect each other, love can be a very beautiful thing…””I
|For those unfamiliar, Welfare payments are made in the US to individuals and families with income below a level. The following quotations are taken from actual letters received by the Welfare Department in applications for support of receiving payments. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and 6 children. I had
I married Miss Right.I just didn’t know her first name was Always.
Salesman: That suit looks nice. It fits like a bandage. Customer: Thanks. I bought it by accident.
Q: Why doesn’t Saddam go out drinking? A: Why should he when he can get bombed at home?
First Convict: I heard the Warden’s daughter up and married a guy down on Cellblock D. The Warden’s mighty upset about it too.Second Convict: Why? Because she married a con?First Convict: No. Because they eloped!
|A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his