I’d like to buy a bed, please. Certainly, madam. Spring mattress? Oh, no! I want to be able to use it all year.
What is the difference in a Knights of Columbus and a Shriner? Answer: A Knight is once a knight ,always a Knight and the Shriners argue that once a night is enough for anyone!
These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations. Found written on the wall in front of a photocopier of a company going through hardships : ” DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE – XEROX YOUR PAYCHECKS ” At a car dealership in Maryland to announce new seat belt legislation: “Belt
There was an old woman on a plane, sitting next to the Pope. It was stormy outside, and the plane wasbeing rocked by some severe turbulence. So this kindly old lady looked upon Death’s door, and said to her papal neighbour. ‘Father, surely you can do something about this…’To which
You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise I’ll lay on my side.
I, Caesar, when I heard of the fame To Cleopatra I straightway laid claim Ahead of my legions I invaded her regions I saw, I conquered, I came!
On a ski lift in Taos, NM: ‘No jumping from the lift. Survivors will be prosecuted.’ Official sign near door: Door Alarmed. Handprinted sign nearby: Window frightened. Road sign seen on the island of Cyprus. (translation of the Greek): ‘Caution: Road Slippery from Grapejuice’ A sign advertising a Company wide