Fred: Have you noticed that your mother smells a bit funny these days? Harry: No. Why? Fred: Well, your sister told me she was giving her a bottle of toilet water for her birthday.
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. ‘All set back here, Captain,’ came
First man: How’d you get that black eye?Second man: I called some woman a two-bit whore.First man: She punched you?Second man: Nope. She hit me with her bag of quarters.
A man is walking down the street when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says CRUISES – $100. He goes into the agency and hands the guy $100. The travel agent then whacks him over the head with a baseball bat and throws him
Abraham Lincoln had a very hard childhood, he had to walk 7 miles to school everyday. Well he should have got up earlier and caught the school bus like everyone else !
Shultz, a lawyer, bribed a man on the jury to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, as opposed to the charge of murder which was brought by the prosecution. The jury was out for nearly a week before they returned to court with the manslaughter verdict. When Shultz paid
Two tourists were driving through Louisiana. As they were approaching Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the employee, “Before we order, could you please settle an argument