A police officer was amazed to see a hiker walking along the road carrying a sign which read “To Seattle.” “What are you doing with that?” asked the police officer. “I’m walking to Seattle,” said the hiker, “and I don’t want to lose my way.”
A doctor, an engineer, and a fungal taxonomist arrived at The Pearly Gates. The doctor said how he’d healed the sick, helped the lame; but he was a sinner and was sent to Hell. The engineer told how he’d built homes for the homeless, etc.; but he messed up the
Things to Remember During a War 1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire. 2. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. 3. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at. 4. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat. 5. No
A cleaning woman was applying for a new position. When askedwhy had she left her previous employment, she replied, “Yes,sir, they paid good wages, but it was the most ridiculousplace I ever worked. Last night they played a game calledBridge and a lot of folks were there. As I was
The transatlantic liner was experiencing particularly heavy weather, and Mrs Jones wasn’t feeling well. “Would you care for some more supper, ma’am?” asked the steward. “No, thanks,” replied the wretched passenger. “Just throw it overboard to save me the trouble.”
Morty the producer dies and goes to purgatory. The agent behind the counter says “So Morty, what’s it gonna be Heaven or Hell?” Morty asks, “What’s the difference?” Sid says “Take a look at the monitor over here.” Morty goes to the monitor and sees scenes of heaven where people
Submarines are safer than airplanes. Proof in the fact is there are more airplanes in the water than submarines in the air! ——————————————————————————– Response from a junior (very junior) sonar watchstander “Sonar – Conn, Report all contacts in preparation in coming to periscope depth” “Conn – Sonar, I hold no