While cruising at 40,000 feet, the airplane shuddered and Mr. Smith looked out the window. “Good lord!” he screamed, “one of the engines just caught fire!” Other passengers left their seats and came running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet another engine caught fire
A man came storming out of the courthouse ranting and raving; obviously really angry . He stomped accross the street and into the bar and flounced down on a stool muttering, “Asshole attorneys”. The man next to him recoiled in outrage saying “I want you to know I highly resent
Guys have feelings too. But, like, who cares? I don’t believe in miracles. I rely on them. Next mood swing: 6 minutes. I hate everybody, and you’re next. Please don’t make me kill you. I used to be schizophrenic, but we’re okay now. I’m busy. You’re ugly. Have a nice
Jill’s car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One day John got yet another one of those calls. “What happened this time?” he asked. “My brakes went out,” Jill said. “Can you come to get me?” “Where are you?” John asked. “I’m
Confucius Say…Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.He who lives in glass house, dress in basement.Passionate kiss, like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.Better to be pissed off than pissed on.He who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok.Boy who go to sleep with stiff problem wake
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco’s Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price. “Twelve dollars for the
A man learned shortly before quitting time that he had to attend a meeting. He tried unsuccessfully to locate his car-pool members to let them know that he would not be leaving with them. Hastily he scribbled a message to one fellow and left it on his desk: “I have