Q: Why do cats like to hear other cats make noise? – A: It’s meow-sic to their ears!
Defendant: Your Honor, I want you to appoint me another lawyer.Judge: And why is that?Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn’t interested in my case.Judge (to Public Defender): Do you have any comments on the defendant’s motion?Public Defender: I’m sorry, Your Honor. I wasn’t listening.
Once upon a time there was this guy who bought a hang glider and took it out to the mountains to fly it. He was cruising along a few hundred feet above the treetops when he spots these two hunters down below.He hollers and waves at them, trying to be
Mrs. Whembleton decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, “Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.””But, Madam, you are not wearing any of those things.””True enough,” said Mrs. Whembleton. “If I should predecease my dear husband I know he will
OUCH! A couple hobbled into a Washington emergency room covered in bloody restaurant towels. The man had his around his waist, and the woman had hers around her head. They eventually explained to doctors that they had gone out that evening for a romantic dinner. Overcome with passion, the woman
A couple of senior couples were strolling along, wives in front, husbands in back chatting. Bernie turns to Marv and says,”Ya know, we went to a new restaurant last night and had the best meal ever. Great prices, too.”Marv smiles and says, “Well, we like to eat out too. So
Lorena Bobbitt had just cut off her husband’s penis. She was driving down the road, wondering what to do with it, when the thought struck her to toss it out the window. The penis bounced off the windscreen of the car travelling in the opposite direction.”Shit,” said the driver to