Grandpa is running around in the nursing home with his privates hanging out of his pants screaming : “My penis just died, my penis just died!”The nurses calm him down,and he goes back to his room. The next day, grandpa is running around again with his privates hanging out, so
Psychological Christmas SongsSCHIZOPHRENIA – Do You Hear What I Hear?MULTIPLE PERSONALITY – We Three Kings Disoriented Are.DEMENTIA – I Think I’ll Be Home For Christmas.NARCISSISTIC – Hark The Herald Angels Sing (About Me)MANIA – Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and
|A brain walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a pint of beer please.”The barman looks at him and says “Sorry, I can’t serve you.””Why not?” askes the brain.”You’re already out of your head.”
After the annual office Christmas party blow-out, John woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him. “Louise,”
Personally I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that as both husband and Father, I can say anything I want to around the house. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.
President Clinton to maid: Mam, can you do something about Hillary’s room. She complains that it’s the ugliest room in the White House. Maid: Yes, Mr. President–I’ll remove the mirrors right away.
Guy goes to the doctor to get the results of a health check. Doctor says ‘I’ve got good news and bad news, which do you want first?’ Guy says ‘good news first.’ ‘OK, You got 24 hours to live’ ‘Dang, whats the bad news!’ ‘I shoulda’ told you yesterday!’