Two Italian construction workers were in the field on an extremely hot day working.. the one says to the other ” hey how come we do all a da work and he gets all a da money?” pointing to the supervisor. The other says, “I don’t know, go ask him.”
A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds, and he entered a patient’s room to find his patient sitting on the floor, sawing at a piece of wood with the side of his hand. Meanwhile, another patient was in the room, hanging from the ceiling by his feet.
Judge: All your responses to the questions must be oral. Do you understand? A: Yes Judge: What school did you attend in the fall of 1995? A: Oral.
A young businessman rented a beautiful office and furnished it with antiques. However, no business was coming in. Sitting there, worrying, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wanting to look busy, he picked up the phone and pretended he was negotiating a big deal. He spoke loudly
Arbitrator ar’-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonald’s. Avoidable uh-voy’-duh-buhl: What a Italian bullfighter tries to do. Baloney buh-lo’-nee: Where some hemlines fall. Bernadette burn’-a-det: The act of torching a mortgage. Burglarize bur’-gler-ize: What a crook sees with. Counterfeiters kown-ter-fit-ers: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets. Eclipse
Ken: So Mr. President did you ever buy Lewinsky any giftsPrez: I don’t rightly recall … actually I did once splash out on a dressfor her
Prosecutor: Did you kill the victim? Defendant: No, I did not. Prosecutor: Do you know what the penalties are for perjury? Defendant: Yes, I do. And they’re a hell of a lot better than the penalty for murder.