Q: How many republicans does it take to raise your taxes? A: None. The democrats do that.

Q: How many republicans does it take to disarm the law abiding public so that the government can enforce totalitarianistic and unconstitutional laws? A: None. The Sociali–Democrats do that

Democrats get back at the Republicans on their Christmas list by giving them fruitcakes. Republicans re-wrap them and send them to in-laws.

Democrat men like to watch football while the women fix holiday meals. On this, Republicans are in full agreement.

Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending 50, one buck at a time, to panhandlers on the street.

Republicans first began thinking like Republicans when they stopped believing in Santa Claus. Democrats became Democrats because they never stopped believing in Santa Claus.