An army Major visits the sick soldiers, goes up to one private and asks -“What’s your problem, Soldier?””Chronic syphilis, Sir!””What treatment are you getting?””Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!””What’s your ambition?””To get back to the front lines, Sir!””Good man!” says the Major.He goes to the next bed.”What’s
Category: Miscellaneous
Total 3979 Posts
A farmer had three sons. One day his oldest came to him and said that since he was graduating from high school, he would really like to get a car.His father said, “Son, come here.” He took him to the barn and pointed to the tractor and said, “This tractor
An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice.The doctor advised that she run 10 miles a day for 30 days.This, he promised, would help her lose as much as twenty pounds.The blonde follows the doctor’s advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she’d indeed lost twenty
The Rookie Cop…A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.The rookie rolled down his
The Shoplifter…A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store.”Listen,” said the shoplifter, “I know you don’t want any trouble either.What do you say I just buy the watch and we forget about this?”The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip.The crook looked
A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation.There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking.The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says,”Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.”Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows
Feeling edgy, a man took a hot bath.Just as he became comfortable, the doorbell rang.The man got out of the tub, put on his slippers and robe and went to the door.A salesman at the door wanted to know if he needed any brushes.Slamming the door, the man returned to