Patron: Waiter!Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I’ll be your Support waiter.Waiter. What seems to be the problem?Patron: There’s a fly in my soup!Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time.Patron: No, it’s still there.Waiter: Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup. Try eating it
Category: Miscellaneous
Total 3979 Posts
Kids: “Hello Miss Saunders, can Johnny come out to play?” Mother: “I am sorry kids but you know Johnny has leprosy,” Kids: “Well, then can we come in and watch him rot?”
Chuck Norris, Arnold Swartzenagger, and Jean Claud VanDam, were talking one day. Chuck Norris asked, “If you were a musician, who would you be?”.Chuck Norris said, “I would be Motzart.” Jean Claud VanDam said, “I would be Bethoven.” Arnold said, “I’ll be Bach!”
How do you know a blonde’s been at your computer? The joystick’s wet.How else do you know a blonde’s been at your computer? There’s white out on the screen.How do you know she’s been back? There’s writing on the white out.What do a turtle and a blonde have in common?
You’re momma so fat, she be sellin’ shade!You’re momma so ugly, she walked down the street and got arrested for indecent exposure!You’re momma so old, her s*#t has wrinkles!You’re momma so stupid, she gave birth to you and asked the doctor if you were hers!You’re momma so poor, her idea
Why did the condom fly across the room?? It got pissed off!!!
Q. What happens when a frog parks illegaly?A. It gets toad!