Q: When driving through fog what should you use?A: Your car!

How are daughter’s boyfriends like cockroaches?They hang around the kitchen and it’s hard to get rid of them!

An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news,” the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after

Waiter to customer: “Our specialty is snails.””I know. One of them served me the last time I was here!”

How are men like diplomas?You spend lots of time getting one, but once you have it, you don’t know what to do with it.

Never slap a man who chews tobacco.There are many many more asses in the world than donkeys.Wooden legs are not hereditary, wooden heads are.Free cheese is always in a mouse trap.An ugly carpet will last forever.

What piece of furniture was named after the typical man?The La-Z-Boy recliner.