You Might Be A College Student:If you average 3 hours of sleep a nightIf your trash is overflowing and your bank account isn’tIf you go to Wal-Mart more than 3 times a weekIf you are personally keeping the local pizza place from bankruptcyIf you wake up 10 minutes before classIf

Why do men like frozen microwave dinners so much?They like being able to both eat and make love in under 5 minutes.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?Four. Actually, only one to screw it in. The other 3 are there to listen to him brag about the screwing part!

What do men and women have in common?They both distrust men.

A woman goes into a bar and orders a beer. She grabs the beer and tips it down the back of her skirt. The barman looks amazed as she orders another and again tips it down her skirt.Finally, the barman says: “Why are you tipping your drinks down your skirt?””Well,”

There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIXThis is not believed to be a coincidence.

How can you tell the difference between men’s real gifts and their guilt gifts?Guilt gifts are nicer.