A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The following exchange took place between the lawyer and the witness: The lawyer: “Did you actually see the accident?” The witness: “Yes, sir.” The lawyer: “How far away were you when the accident happened?” The witness: “Thirty-one feet, six and one quarter
Category: Miscellaneous
Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work. The first one said, “I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. Everything inside is numbered”. “I think librarians are the easiest” said the second surgeon. “When you open them up all their organs are alphabetically ordered”.
These are things that people actually said in court, word for word. Q: What is your date of birth? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. Q: How old is your
A Russian, a Cuban, an American and a Lawyer are in a train. The Russian takes a bottle of the Best Vodka out of his pack, pours some into a glass, drinks it, and says: “In USSR, we have the best vodka of the world, nowhere in the world you
A local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town’s most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. “Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. “Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?” The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn’t hear the question. “Isn’t it true that you accepted five thousand
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. ‘All set back here, Captain,’ came
