Father Murphy walked into a pub and said to the first Marine he met, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The Marine said, “I do Father.” The priest said, “Leave this pub right now!” He then approached a second Marine. “Do you want to got to heaven?” “Certainly, Father,”
Category: Military Jokes
Total 138 Posts
This is the difference between a lousy Golfer and a lousy Parachutist. The lousy Golfer goes splash then damn. The lousy Parachutist goes damn then splash.
A recruit examines the food served to him in the batallion dining room. – Do I have any choice here, he asks a sergeant. – Yes, you do. You may eat it or not.
I was an Air Force ICBM launch control officer in South Dakota. Two officers pulled 24-hour alerts in a launch control center that was surrounded by several Minuteman II silos. The facility and the silos were separated by several miles. We were not allowed to leave the “capsule” until relieved
A Maintenance Battalion in Germany had just received a brand new Executive Officer, an Armor Major. The Major proceeded to issue new SOP directives (Standard Operating Procedures) that WOULD be followed under all circumstances. One of these directives was that NO ONE over the rank of Staff Sergeant would drive
A trooper asks a sergeant: – Is it true that man descended from a monkey? – Yes, troopers possibly were. But not sergeants.
A warrant officer was crossing a road one-day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess”. He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss