|A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He takes his first sip and sets it down. While he is looking around the bar, a monkey swings down and steals the pint of beer from him before he is able to stop the monkey.The man asks the barman

|A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch.The seaman asks, “So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?” The pirate replies, “We were in a

|A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this, the wife wants him to quit; she gets two shot glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey.After getting him to the table that had the glasses, she brings his bait box. She

|Our lager,Which art in barrels,Hollowed be thy drink.I will be drunk,At home as in the travern.Give us this day our foamy head,And forgive us our spillages,As we forgive those who spill against us.And lead us not into incarceration,But deliver us from hangerovers.For thine is the beer. he bitter and The

|The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a friend who asked, “What do you have in there, pal?””A mongoose.””What for?””Well, you know how drunk I can get. When I get drunk I see snakes, and I’m scared to death

|A man walks into a bar and has a couple of beers. Once he is donem the bartender tells him he owes $9.00.”But I paid, don’t you remember?” says the customer. “Okay,” says the bartender, “If you said you paid, you did.” The man then goes outside and tells the