* Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids* Bad: You can’t find your birth control pills* Ugly: Your daughter borrowed them* Good: Your son studies a lot in his room* Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there.* Ugly: You’re in them* Good: Your husband understands fashion* Bad: He’s a cross-dresser* Ugly: He looks better than you* Good: Your son’s finally maturing* Bad: He’s involved with the woman next door* Ugly: So are you* Good: You give the birds and bees talk to your daughter* Bad: She keeps interrupting* Ugly: With corrections* Good: Your wife’s not talking to you* Bad: She wants a divorce* Ugly: She’s a lawyer* Good: The postman’s early* Bad: He’s wearing fatigues and carrying an AK47* Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas* Good: Your daughter got a new job* Bad: As a hooker* Ugly: Your coworkers are her best clients* Way ugly: She makes more money than you do* Good: You’re son is dating someone new* Bad: It’s another man* Ugly: He’s you’re best friend* Good: You’re wife is pregnant.* Bad: It’s triplets* Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago.