LaughWild

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Tag: heart

Total 66 Posts

A precious little

A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?” As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he’s on her level, and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabby

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On the way

On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it. ‘Be still, my heart,’ thought my friend, ‘my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps!’ Then the child spoke to the instrument: “Welcome

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Great Pick Up Lines!

I wish I was one of your tears, so I could be born in your eye, run down your cheek, and die on your lips.Did you know they changed the alphabet? They put U and I together.Can I borrow that quarter, ’cause my mom told me to call home when

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First Body Part to Heaven

The story takes place in a Christian school. The teacher asks the question, “What part of your body gets to heaven first?”Three students raise their hand, Jenny, Jim, and little Johnny in the back. The teacher thinks to herself, “I dont want to call on Johnny cause he will say

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An elderly patient needed a heart transplant…

An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed his options with his doctor. The doctor said, “We have 3 possible donors; the 1st is a young, healthy athlete who died in an automobile accident, the 2nd is a middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and who died flying

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A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner…

A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner.The attorney asks, “Before you signed thedeath certificate had you taken the man’s pulse?” The coroner says, “No.” The attorney then asks, “Did you listen for a heart beat?” “No.” “So when you signed the death certificate you had not takenany steps to

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In the land of Oz

Former Vice President Quayle, Speaker of the HouseGingrich, and President Clinton are traveling in acar together in Kansas. A tornado comes along andwhirls them up into the air and tosses them thousandsof yards away. They all fall into a daze. When they come to and extract themselves from thevehicle, they

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